I returned home after a week away to find my children sleeping on the chilly hallway floor, which was an odd and unnerving sight. With my heart racing, I looked for answers, but all I could find were strange noises coming from the kids’ room and my husband was nowhere to be seen. What I discovered next infuriated me – and made me want to fight!
After spending a week away on a work trip, I must admit that I was eager to return home. Tommy and Alex, my boys, were most likely bouncing off the walls in anticipation of my arrival.
When you’re six or eight years old, a week seems like forever. Mark, too? I assumed that he would be happy to return the control to me. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a fantastic father, but he’s always been the fun parent rather than the responsible one.
I couldn’t help but smile when I arrived into our driveway at midnight. As it should be at this horrible hour, the house was silent and dark.
With my suitcase in hand and keys jingling lightly, I tiptoed to the front door.
I entered, prepared to fall into bed, as the latch clicked open. However, there was a problem.
I froze when my foot struck something soft. I struggled for the light switch, my heart racing. I nearly cried out when the hall came to life.
Like a couple of puppies, Tommy and Alex were splayed on the floor, entangled in blankets. Although they were sound asleep, their hair was sticking up in all directions and their faces were covered in dirt.
“What the devil?” With my head racing, I muttered. Was a fire going on? A spill of gas? What kept them from being in bed?
Afraid to wake them until I understood what was happening, I slipped passed them. Pizza boxes, soda cans, and what appeared to be melting ice cream on the coffee table were all throughout the living room, which was a complete mess. But Mark was nowhere to be seen.
As I walked to our bedroom, my heart was pounding in my chest. empty.
It appeared as though the bed had not been slept in today because it was still made. Where was Mark? His car was in the driveway.
I heard it at that point. A small, muted noise emanated from the lads’ quarters. With my mind going wild, I walked carefully over. Was Mark injured? Had he been tied up by some maniac who had broken in?
I slowly pushed the door open, and
“What. The. Real—” Remembering that the children were just down the hall, I bit my tongue.
Mark was standing there with his controller in hand and headphones on, surrounded by snack wrappers and empty energy drink cans. However, that wasn’t even the most absurd aspect.
Some sort of gamer paradise had been created in the boys’ room. There were LED lights all over the place, a huge TV occupied one wall, and I believe the hideous object in the corner was a mini-fridge.
The anger grew inside of me like a volcano ready to erupt, and I stood there with my mouth hanging open. Mark was so focused on whatever game he was playing that he hadn’t even spotted me yet.
I walked over with a stomp and grabbed his headphones. “Mark! What on earth is happening?
He seemed disoriented and blinked at me. “Hey, sweetie. You arrive home early.
“Early? Midnight has arrived! What is causing our kids to sleep on the floor?
With a shrug, he grabbed his controller once more. “Oh, it’s all right. Outside, the lads were contentedly napping. They considered it to be an adventure.
I grabbed hold of the controller. “A journey? Mark, they’re not camping! They’re dozing off on the filthy floor of our hallway!
He tried to reclaim the controller and pleaded, “Come on, don’t be such a buzzkill.” “Everything is in order. I’ve been giving them food and other things.
Are you feeding them? Do you mean the ice cream and pizza cartons in the living room? With each phrase, I could feel my blood pressure rising. “How about taking a bath? Or, I’m not sure, their real beds?
Mark gave an eye roll. Sarah, they’re all right. Relax a little.
I lost it at that point.
“Lighten up? GLOW UP? While you play video games in their room, our kids are dozing off like animals on the floor! What’s wrong with you?
“I have nothing wrong with me,” he sighed. “All I’m attempting to do is get some alone time. Is that really so bad?
Trying not to scream, I inhaled deeply. “You know what? Right now, we’re not doing this. Head over to the lads’ beds. Right now.
However, I’m in the midst of—
“Mark, NOW!”
Despite his complaints, he stood up and shuffled by me.
Tommy twitched slightly but did not wake up as I watched him lift him up. I couldn’t help but notice how similar the man acting like a child and the real youngster appeared when Mark carried him to bed.
The filth on Alex’s face made my heart ache a little as I picked him up. I made up my mind when I put him to bed. I would treat Mark exactly like a child if that was his desire.
I implemented my strategy the following morning.
I sneaked inside the man cave Mark had made and unplugged everything while he was taking a shower. After that, I started working.
I was waiting for him, grinning broadly, when he came downstairs, his hair still damp. Greetings, my love! I prepared breakfast for you.
He gave me a suspicious glance. “Thanks, huh?”
I placed a plate before him. A Mickey Mouse pancake with a fruit smiling face was in the center. He had a sippy cup of coffee.
“What is this?” he probed the pancake.
“Silly, it’s your breakfast! We have a huge day ahead of us, so eat up now!
I displayed my work, a huge, vibrant chore chart that was affixed to the refrigerator, after breakfast. “Observe what I created for you!”
Mark’s eyes got bigger. “What on earth is that?”
“Language!” I reprimanded. You have your own task chart! You see? Cleaning your room, doing the dishes, and putting your toys away will win you gold stars!
“My playthings? What are you— Sarah?
I interrupted him. “Oh, and remember! Our house has a new rule. Screens must be turned off by precisely 9 p.m. Your phone is part of that, sir!
Mark’s expression changed from bewildered to irate. “Are you serious? I’m an adult; I don’t require—
“Ah, ah, ah!” I gestured with my finger. “You’ll have to go to the timeout corner if you argue!”
I remained steadfast for the following week. I would unplug his game system and turn off the Wi-Fi every night at nine o’clock.
I even read him “Goodnight Moon” in my most calming voice before tucking him into bed with a drink of milk.
Plastic dishes with tiny partitions were used to serve his meals. I offered him animal crackers as a snack and sliced his sandwiches into dinosaur shapes. I would say things like, “Use your words, honey,” in response to his complaints. Big boys don’t complain.
One significant source of conflict was the task chart. I would make a big show of handing him a gold star each time he finished a task.
“Look at you, doing it alone—putting your washing away! Mommy is so proud.
“I’m not a child, Sarah,” he would murmur, gritting his teeth.
I’d respond, “Of course not, sweetie.” Who would like to assist in baking cookies now?
About a week into my small experiment, the breaking point occurred. After having a tantrum about his two-hour screen usage limit, Mark was just sent to the timeout corner. I quietly set the kitchen timer while he sat there furious.
“This is absurd!” he erupted. “For heaven’s sake, I’m an adult now!”
I arched an eyebrow. “Oh? Are you certain of that? Because grown guys don’t force their kids to sleep on the floor so they can spend the entire night playing video games.
He became somewhat deflated. “All right, I understand! I apologize!
I looked at him for a while. Even though he appeared to be truly sorry, I wasn’t going to spare him when I had one final blow to give.
“Oh,” I answered politely, “I accept your apology.” “But I’ve already given your mother a call.”
He lost the color in his face. “You didn’t.”
Just as expected, someone knocked on the door. When I opened it, I saw Mark’s mother, who looked like a really disappointed parent.
She yelled, “Mark!” and strode into the home. “Did you actually force my darlings to sleep on the ground so you could indulge in your small games?”
It was as though Mark wanted the floor to collapse and engulf him. “It’s not, Mom. I mean, I didn’t.
Her expression softened as she turned to face me. “I’m so sorry you had to deal with this, Sarah, my love. I believed that I had raised him better.
I gave her an arm pat. Linda, it’s not your fault. Simply put, some males mature more slowly than others.
Mark had a blazing red face. “Please, Mom. I am thirty-five years old.
Linda turned back to me, ignoring him. “Don’t worry, though. My schedule for the upcoming week is free. I’ll quickly get this lad back in shape!
I got Mark’s attention as Linda hurried to the kitchen, complaining about the condition of the dishes. He appeared completely defeated.
“Sarah,” he murmured. “I really apologize. I was careless and self-centered. It won’t occur once more.
I became a little softer. “I understand, my dear. However, I need to know that you have everything under control while I’m away. Instead of another playmate, the boys need a father.
He seemed embarrassed as he nodded. “You’re correct. I swear, I’ll perform better.
I kissed him quickly and grinned. “I’m sure you will. Why don’t you go do the dishes for your mother now? Perhaps we can have ice cream for dessert if you perform well.
It was impossible for me not to feel a little smug as Mark walked off to the kitchen. I hoped that was a lesson learned. And I still had that timeout nook prepared and waiting in case…